What I Learned From Working With a Confidence Coach

I was thinking everything again. What I say at the meeting, how to present myself in a new social environment, whether my opinions were even worth sharing. That’s why I found comfort in etiquette for so long. It was a set of rules that felt like a safe roadmap due to uncertainty. But as I grew older I realized that true confidence wasn’t about following arbitrary voluntary standards, and not about trusting myself. So, when I stopped guessing for a second time and finally wanted to feel based on my decision, I turned to a confident coach. Everything I learned changed.

How to be confident – Tips from a confident coach himself

Confidence, or lack of that, especially for women, expands into every part of our lives. It’s something that is uniquely trained by a confident coach to help you reveal and strengthen. It defines how we feel about our bodies, our friendships, and our careers (con syndrome, someone?). And we have been conditioned to make ourselves smaller in every sense, so connecting with our innate confidence doesn’t just feel like a challenge. In many cases, that may seem impossible.

I connected Daniela RussoThe Amsterdam-based coach of life and confidence is not only about her expertise and training, but also about her personal stories revealing the reality of confidence. When asked Russo how she looked confidently, she explains the experiences that many women can relate to. She remembers not feeling special or “good enough.”

But she was always working hard to pursue her goals. And when she moved to Rome for university, her efforts began to pay off. Pairing her goals with an action plan (how modified to plan A, plan B, etc.) required “right effort and determination” to realize her dream. That’s when she began to believe in herself, Russo says.

Confidence is practice and proof that we can all build for ourselves. First, Russo shares tips for finding your unique voice, increasing your value and confidently stepping into every field of your life.

How can I live more confidently?

There are so many misconceptions about confidence. It is often confused with self-esteem or considered an innate personality trait. (You’re either born from it or not.) But Russo says, “Confidence is not something you have; it’s something you create.” And to the skeptic, she adds this note: You can always generate confidence.

“Confidence is a sense of power within yourself, and a sense of certainty that you can do it,” Russo argues. She added that no one has a baseline, constant confidence. Instead, she explains that she can turn on the key and use her confidence when she needs it.

The success cycle and the power of your beliefs

Your beliefs are one of the key factors that influence your confidence, says Russo. If you’re good to do something, but tell yourself: I’ve never done this before so probably won’t succeed, You rarely exploit your potential.

She associates this with the success cycle. This is a model to explain why success leads to more success and failure. Russo will show you the momentum behind your beliefs and how you can guide your path to success and stay there. It’s a kind of insight that gives you the confidence that a coach brings to every conversation. Reconstructs failure not as evidence of inadequacy, but as a stepping stone to growth.

When you fail, your brain turns this moment back as proof – essentially speaking Come on, I told you. It can begin to build a cycle and establish a reinforcement belief pattern. Your brain points to that experience as truth, and then you don’t believe in yourself much, so it becomes even more challenging to engage your potential and take action. “It gives even worse results,” Russo says.

But she adds soon. This also works the opposite. “When you know you’re going to succeed, you’ll take advantage of more possibilities and take more actions. From there, you’ll get great results.”

It can also have positive results so that the success cycle can push you further into the cycle of failure. “At this point, your belief system says, I will succeed no matter what I do. Whatever I do, I get great results.

“Your beliefs become even stronger. As you’ve come into that success cycle, it drives you to a whole new level. That’s how you form your beliefs.”

What can a confident coach really do for you?

“A confident coach can help you stop doubting yourself and your abilities,” Russo says. She highlights some of the other benefits of working with a confident coach.

• You can learn to set clear boundaries and improve your communication skills.
• You can easily face daily challenges.
• You may feel happy in your life and be more fulfilled in your career.
• You will learn how to better control your emotions and overcome ways to limit fear and beliefs.
• By the end of the coaching process, you don’t really care about what other people think of you.

Signs you may need to work with a confident coach

• You compare yourself to others and feel that your peers are better than you.
• You feel uneasy about yourself and doubt your abilities despite your success.
• You put pressure on yourself to meet your very high standards.
• You are often afraid to speak up at work meetings and are afraid to be judged.
• You have high expectations of yourself, and even small mistakes will question your abilities.

According to a confident coach, 5 tips to boost your confidence

First, Russo shares her top 5 tips to help you build confidence. From there, you will be able to experience the personal growth and professional success that your belief in yourself can bring. Developing confidence will ensure you approach life and lean on the joy and expansion behind every challenge.

1. Discard the need for approval.

Stop asking for approval and verification. The more you seek it, the less you will. Confident people don’t care what other people think about them. While behavior seeking approval is somewhat normal, the problem begins when you start comparing yourself to others. You will always find someone who is better than you.

No matter what you do, accept that someone doesn’t like you. Rejection is a part of your life and it is inevitable. You never get everyone’s verification and approval (and trying to do so can be destructive).

Make it happen: Instead, compare yourself to yourself by comparing yourself to others. Are you doing your best? What progress have you made?

2. Be satisfied with the discomfort.

One of the most important characteristics of successful people is their willingness to promote their comfort zone. Are they afraid? of course!

You expand it every time you push your comfort zone.

Your comfort zone is just like muscles. It cannot grow without sweating a little. Whenever you do something that scares you, you make that fear less and more comfortable with something unpleasant. Most successful people are willing to take calculated risks and accept that certain circumstances make them uncomfortable. However, they recognize that the potential reward is much greater than temporary discomfort. Become that person.

Make it happen: What is the one activity that scares you? Identify it and make a conscious decision to do it. Set that fear time and face.

3. Pay attention to your body language.

Pay attention to your posture and be aware of your body language. Instead of leaning forward, looking down, or not maintaining eye contact, try standing consciously. Please raise your head. When I walk, I always walk with a sense of direction. These small changes can dramatically affect the way you feel.

Make it happen: Be careful about how you feel when maintaining a good posture. Pay attention to your energy and how confident you are. The next time you want to cross your arms or lean forward, consciously take notes and switch to a more confident and open position.

4. Emulates people who are confident.

Tell them how they speak. Wear the way they dress. Move the way they move. Modeling is based on the notion that reinventing the wheel is meaningless unless necessary. If you’re trying to do something someone else has already achieved, don’t just try to be original for it. Instead, learn from the best and inspire you on the path to success.

Make it happen: Think of people you admire that success reflects the milestones you want to achieve. For example, someone who has built a thriving business, ran a marathon, or wrote a book. We promise to study their path to success and learn from it. What worked for them? How can I use that information to lay the foundation for my journey?

5. Trust yourself in one promise at a time.

You can start with the smallest ones – something simple you know you’re going to deliver. Celebrate when you achieve that. Acknowledge that you are trying to do it and speak to yourself loudly. This will help you build your own credibility.

Make it happen: Choose what you can by the end of the day. Write to your to-do list and prioritize it. At the end of your day, lean on that sense of accomplishment and build momentum for even more success.

Take home

If you are more confident in your career, relationships, or simply how you carry yourself throughout the day, working with a confident coach might be the next step. As Russo proves, it’s not about becoming a new person, but about revealing your already capable and powerful version.

This post was last updated on April 16, 2025 to include new insights.