Serve the Guests the Nuts

Every year, a package arrived. The dollar store cans were filled with date pinwheel cookies, red and green dipped pretzels, and best of all, what we affectionately called “dad nuts.”

My partner’s dad made candied (but not really) too much We cooked the pecans so low and slow that the sugar clumps around them like clear shellac. However, it had just the right amount of saltiness. No matter what size cans we received, they were the first to run out, and every time we wanted something, we’d say, “Can you give me your dad’s nuts?” Stupid joke. It gets even better because no one laughs. (It also goes great with apple cider Old Fashioned.)

I’m not that much of a traditionalist. But damn, I love little gestures like when you hand out cans to your family. For a few years, I’ll reuse the cans and fill them with things like cheese subs, grapefruit zest, and scallion scones to give to loved ones. Canned food is cheaper, but that’s the general rule. It’s recycling at its most fun. Over time, the cans will become scratched and leave old Scotch tape tattoos. They are just vessels. What is inside is love. That may also be easy.

So things happen. My father-in-law is leaving for the afterlife. You better believe I mentioned “dad nuts” in that eulogy. to a crowd of teary-eyed families.

Had to keep these nuts going. When I asked for the recipe, I was met with sparse documentation of suspiciously low salt levels and shocking developments. Above the document is the recipe title: “Grandma Miller’s Pecans.”

So to begin with, they were actually grandma’s nuts.

dad’s nuts

4 tablespoons (half a stick) unsalted butter, melted
1/4 cup light corn syrup (or maple syrup)
1 teaspoon salt (or 2 teaspoons Diamond Crystal kosher salt)
1 teaspoon smoked paprika
1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper or 1-2 teaspoons red pepper flakes (Nut fat can accept it)
1 pound pecans or whatever gets you excited
flaky salt on top

Optional add-ins: 1 tablespoon chopped rosemary. Black pepper. 1/2 teaspoon of saffron has bloomed. Edible glitter.

Preheat the oven to 250 degrees. Yes, 250 degrees! I’m going to take it slow today. In a large bowl, combine melted butter, syrup, salt, and spices. Add the pecans and mix well with a spatula.

Spread the saucy nuts on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper and bake for 1 hour, stirring the nuts every 15 minutes. As the sugar begins to solidify, the nuts will darken in color and give off a pleasant aroma. The oven is specialized so it will take an hour or more, but be sure to check it every 10 minutes to make sure it doesn’t burn. Add plenty of flaky salt at the end or when you remove it from the oven. It will crisp up as it cools, so don’t panic if it’s a little sticky at the end.

If you wish, we can also package your items in recycled cans.

This also reminds us that it’s the perfect time to make a martini and rewatch the movie. thin man.

PS Three starters served at a dinner party and eight food writers sharing holiday cookies.