“This family is just like ours!” my 10-year-old son excitedly told my wife and I as we walked hand in hand down Commercial Street in Provincetown, Massachusetts. It was 2014, and we had traveled there for the first time from our home in Indiana for Family Week, a week-long event for LGBTQ+ families hosted by a national nonprofit organization. family equality.
My family and I had visited Provincetown as part of a New England cruise in the late ’90s, but that visit only lasted a limited time. family week. Little did we know what magic a trip to Family Week would have in store years later.
The magic began when we rounded the tip of Long Point Beach on the ferry from Boston to Provincetown for our first family week. As we rounded the tip of Cape Cod and the quaint fishing town came into view, we knew this was going to be a special week.
Built on the ancestral lands of the Wampanoag and Nauset tribes, Provincetown includes rich historyart galleries, cozy coffee shops, and delicious restaurants. There’s no Starbucks or McDonald’s. Chain stores generally don’t match the city’s charm. Throughout its history, it has been a haven for fishermen, Portuguese immigrants, creators, artists, writers, and LGBTQ+ people. This community continues to be a welcoming place, and that was evident from the moment we stepped off the ferry.
Right away, my wife and I felt comfortable holding hands as we walked down the street. In our Indiana community, after 28 years together, we still haven’t done that. In Provincetown, people don’t give a second glance to two women holding hands, two fathers and their children in coordinated outfits, or a drag queen on a scooter promoting that night’s show. I’m looking at you, Miss Litchfield!
It’s the atmosphere of Provincetown (also affectionately known as P-Town) that makes it the perfect setting for the world’s largest annual family week for LGBTQ+ families, now in its 30th year. Ptown attracts hundreds of families from all over the United States and even a few from abroad, and during the week it’s busy with children and parents weaving through the crowded streets in strollers and bicycles. Some families stay in vacation rentals or historic boutique hotels, while others camp in the dunes. Some, like my family, come from states where anti-LGBTQ+ policies have exacerbated the need for a place where we can breathe and just be. Family Week is a week where my family remains the same. We fit in, and that’s a beautiful thing.
Back in 2014, on our first trip to Family Week (a trip we had been saving up for all year), we worked hard on every program we could incorporate into each day. Activities for my 10-year-old son to meet friends he still keeps in touch with, school board meetings with policy and advocacy experts, beach bashes with LGBTQ+ families along the coast as far as the eye can see, and lots of walking and biking. We cram as much weird joy into every hour of each day until we collapse into bed at the end of the day. We were exhausted but energized at the same time.
After a busy and busy week of making new friends, learning and thoroughly having fun, the week ended with the Family Pride Parade. There, LGBTQ+ parents, their children and their extended families marched down the main thoroughfare, Commercial Street, holding handmade signs, rainbow flags, bubbles and smiling faces. At my first Family Pride Parade, my eyes filled with tears as business owners and shoppers came out to cheer and applaud our family. It reminded me of the power of our love, our resilience, and our commitment to the LGBTQ+ community, my community. And I choke every time.
As I boarded the ferry back to Boston at the end of Family Week, a wave of emotion and gratitude washed over me. Thank you for the experience, for my family being able to travel to Provincetown, for the memories, and for the acceptance. And isn’t that what we all want? To connect. To find friends. And to be loved and celebrated.
Family Week has been and continues to be a truly transformative experience for my family. It changed us for the better and gave us the support, confidence, and connection we needed for the remaining 51 weeks of this year.
I’m now employed by Family Equality, a new transformation born out of Family Week, but many years ago I wasn’t even part of the team yet. At the time, I was leading communications for our community’s public transit system. And in between driving their youngest son to baseball practice, volunteering at school, and keeping in touch with their oldest son, 21, who lived in a nearby apartment, the family was looking for community. We found it during Family Week that year.
We all deserve to have that sense of belonging. We’re waiting for you at Family Week in Provincetown.
Tonya Agnew She is Vice President of Communications and Marketing for Family Equality and has attended Family Week 11 times.
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