Chef Susan Feniger on Coming Out, Leading with Inclusivity, and the Transformative Power of Food

A well-known chef, restaurateur and LGBTQ+ advocate, Susan Feniger has spent more than 40 years shaping the culinary scene in Los Angeles. Feniger is the co-owner of popular restaurants such as Border Grill, Socalo, Socalo, Alice B. and BBQ Mexicana, leaving behind a lasting legacy not only through her innovative flavours but also through her uncertain dedication to community, inclusivity and reliability.

In a recent conversation with Gaty, Feniger opened up about her journey. She quietly came out while working in the kitchen, and became a visible role model for young queer chefs, empowering LGBTQ+ young people through the Los Angeles LGBT Center’s Culinary Arts Program.

A culinary journey that sparks passion

Pheniger had never imagined a food career. While majoring in economics in college, she noticed a long transformation in the dishroom and kitchen.

“My boss told me, ‘Why are you studying economics? You should be a chef,'” she recalls. The proposal sparked something for her. She persuaded her economics professor to complete her final year as an independent study at the American Culinary Institute in Hyde Park, New York. “I never looked back.”

Navigate your identity in a public career

When she appears as a strange woman, she initially does not intersect with Pheniger’s culinary career. But she remembers the early moments of her public life when she felt she had to hide who she was.

“Mary Sue [Milliken] And I was starting on TV, we were interviewed TV GuideShe said. “I realized I was hiding who my partner was. Mary Sue would talk about Josh, but I wouldn’t say anything. That’s when I realized I was nervous about being in the public eye.”

However, in her daily life, Pheniger was always open. And as her confidence grew, she promised to be visible, not for personal gain, but for the next generation. “It would have meant a lot to young people to see someone like me leading the kitchen and living a real life.”

Building a comprehensive kitchen and culture

During her career, Pheniger used her platform to create a safe and inclusive space. She and Miliken have long led teams with values ​​rooted in collaboration, diversity and mentorship.

“I think what I’m most proud of is the culture we created,” Phoeniger said. “From border grills to zocalo, our kitchen has always welcomed everyone, before inclusivity is considered “trendy.” ”

Their influence is far beyond restaurants. Phoeniger has coached countless individuals, women, immigrants and LGBTQ+ people, who have continued to thrive in the hospitality industry. “It’s about making people feel seen and giving back to the community that supports us.”

Unique Personal Partnership

The relationship between Feniger and Milliken has become a legendary tale of friendship, business insight and mutual respect. One of the more colorful aspects? Miliken is married to Feniger’s ex-husband.

“Mary Sue is always joking and doing therapy,” Feniger laughed. “But honestly, I set them up! She was dating some weirdness. I thought she should meet my ex. They fell in love right away.”

Despite the unconventional family dynamics, their partnership remains solid. “We have been business partners for 44 years. This is longer than most marriages. Life is troubling, but we navigate with humor and heart.”

Advocate through food

As an executive and co-chair of the Cooking Arts Program at the Los Angeles LGBT Center, Feniger plays an active role in providing support and career training to LGBTQ+ youth and older adults.

“The center is very close to my heart,” she said. “You can see young people who have been rejected by their families step into the kitchen, gain skills and feel a sense of belonging. That’s all.”

This program not only teaches cooking techniques, but also builds confidence. “So many strange young people are said to not belong to them. Programs like this, you belong. You have a place at the table.”

Giving hope during a crisis

Feniger and Miliken’s commitment to services also extends to disaster relief. During the LA wildfires, they worked with World Central Kitchen to join the ground with Prince Harry, Meghan Markle and actress Jennifer Garner providing meals to evacuees and first responders.

“I was there and fed people who lost everything. I was humbled,” she said. “Food isn’t just nutrition. In times of crisis, comfort is: “You’re not alone.” That’s the power of a warm meal. ”

Pride and future battle

As Pride Month approached, Feniger emphasized that vision remains essential. “Pride is when you stand up, use our voices and be proud of who we are,” she said. “It’s not just about celebrations anymore, it’s about resistance.”

Her restaurant marks the opportunity with special events and initiatives supporting LGBTQ+ nonprofits. “We emphasize Pride Brunch, Theme Cocktails, Queer Providers and Artists,” she said. “Pride is an opportunity to lift up each other and oppose those who are trying to silence us.”

Advice for the next generation

For young LGBTQ+ chefs and entrepreneurs, Feniger offers this advice. “Follow your heart. Do what you love with passion. I never checked my watch on the shift. I loved my work. I know that’s the right path.”

In a career filled with admiration, television appearances and culinary innovation, Susan Feniger’s greatest legacy is the life she touched, and the commitment to a caring and authentic life.

Chef Susan Feniger has come out and leads in inclusiveness and food transformation power.