Last Thursday, Caitlin (our 17) took Mika (2) to the target. He was So I was excited to go out a little with her. However, about 20 minutes later, my phone started ringing.
It was a Fasety Time Call…and on the other side of the screen was a very distraught Mika, a complete sob.
“I want to buy some toys, but Caitlyn won’t forgive me!” he cried. “She says I don’t have the money, and I can’t buy it without it!”
My mom’s heart melted. His big tears. His little voice. His obvious heartbreak. I wanted to scooped him up and correct him. Kaitlynn: “Buy some toys!”
But I caught myself…and I didn’t.
Because I knew this was strong despite only two of him. The moment I teach.
We are not just raising children now…
One of the greatest gifts we can give to our children is to think about their present, not just about their future. What do they face when they’re out on their own? Which habits and ideas will be most useful to them as adults?
That long-term thinking leads to starting to teach money skills early in our home.
We want our children to understand the value of their money, the importance of working for what they want, and how they are thoughtful and intentional about spending.
We have started these conversations with Mika over the past few months. We are giving him the opportunity to do extra chores to make money. He is often reminded that if he wants to buy toys or something else while he is shopping, he needs to bring his own money.
So, when Mika had no money on her target, Caitlin did exactly what we had tried to model over the years. She gently explained that she would not be able to buy anything unless he brought the money. Just like I did it with her when she was little.
When I saw Mika’s tears, I couldn’t be more proud of her, despite the fact that it was really hard to stand on my ground and follow this.
But what do you know? He went home and was able to buy that $1 toy car, telling all his family about how to make money the next time he went to Target. And he’s been talking about it over and over since Thursday.
It is clear that he received the message and he is now very motivated. Can’t wait for him to return to Target immediately and buy that $1 car. He will be very proud of his efforts and we will praise him and celebrate with him with his achievements!
It starts when they’re little
The way we interact with money in front of our children — even for toddlers — is the basis for our financial understanding of life in the future.
If you want to be ownership and responsibility for your finances as an adult, you need to start shaping that way of thinking when you’re young.
That doesn’t mean us Not once Buy things for our children. But that means we are meant to help with the money. Money is not infinite, it works to win it.
If we always succumb to buy toys, we take them away the opportunity:
Learn the joy of salvation and working towards a goal. Practice patience. It nurtures satisfaction. Growing up in gratitude for what they already own.
Don’t underestimate what your child can do
I got a bit of a pushback over the weekend when I shared this on Instagram. Some parents didn’t feel they could understand this concept of a two-year-old child working to understand money or make money to buy something.
All children are different, yes. David is four years old and has Down syndrome and other medical complexities and does not expect this same level of understanding or personal ownership from him when it comes to money. However, the concept of him looking for ways to encourage him to take personal ownership is still the same. We have help by closing the door to him, carrying things, succumbing ourselves to his car seat and trying to put away his toys.
All children are different, yes…but most children can do much more than we give them credit.
When we believe in them, we speak life on them and give them the opportunity to try and grow – they often rise to the challenge.
So I say: Let them try. It will make them fail. Let them solve the problem. Be proud of their efforts and progress, whether messy or incomplete.
Just the other day, Kierstyn (she’ll turn 5 this month!) wanted to create a tube feed formula for David. by herself. This is a multi-step process with many ingredients and scoops. I didn’t think she could do it…but I didn’t tell her.
Instead, he said, “I love how you want to help. Do you know what to do?”
She went and got almost all the ingredients herself (I forgot only her!). I led her to measure – and she did it Perfect. I just helped mix it into a bag and pour it.
She was so proud of herself and I was very impressed! A reminder of how capable she is, was to make sure she wasn’t limiting her just because she was small. These little moments are important. They are components of confidence, resilience and independence.
The same applies to children of all ages, whether infants or teenagers, college or adults. Believe them, give them a try, speak the words of life on them, tell them how competent they are, and give them the opportunity to practice taking on more and more ownership of their lives as they grow and learn.
We raise not only children but adults
My hope is not to raise a perfect child. My hope is to raise children who love Jesus, have a strong work ethic and believe in their ability to solve problems in the face of difficulties.
That’s why we start early.
So I even got them to try it out, even if it was appealing to jump into them and do it for them. And that’s why we think it’s important for them to fail from time to time… They didn’t bring the money, so don’t get that toy to the target. What they learned from it wasn’t failure, if it provides a powerful lesson that will lead to more success in the future!
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Source: Money Saving Mom® – moneysavingmom.com
