a beautiful person,
It’s a new year and I’ve already had two firsts in my life. Recently, I went viral on Twitter for the first time, which was a very strange experience, but in many ways a good one. It was strange for me because I’ve been on Twitter for over 10 years and even though I tweet a lot, I’ve never really thought about going viral. Like most people, I tweet random things, but I also tweet useful things when I think of them.
FYI: Unless there is an NDA, don’t submit a full creative concept to a brand until the contract has been finalized and signed.
— Ashley Carter (@iamfabellis) January 7, 2022
In addition to this, I Features One of my favorite brands is Dr. Martens shoes. If you follow me on Instagram, you know that 75% of my feet are made up of Dr. Martens. I love them so much, guide To answer questions about them, I get asked about them so often that when I got a notification on my phone that my photo had been featured, I couldn’t believe it at first.
I couldn’t believe it because I’ve been wearing Dr. Martens for the last three years and I’ve never been featured on their page. And to top it off, they rarely feature plus size bodies on their page. I was already thinking about sending them a DM because the lack of body diversity was so glaring and starting to bother me as a customer. And then all of a sudden… I was featured on their pageIt was such an amazing feeling, not just for me, but just to see a plus-size person on my page. “OK! This is progress! Yes!”
I spent most of my day at work getting excited about the feature, but when I got a chance to check it out again after work, I began to realize the impact of being featured on a large platform that doesn’t normally showcase plus-size bodies. First off, I’ll say that I’ve experienced a bit of fat phobia online before, but it was so minor that I was able to laugh it off, block the person quickly, and go about my day. I had never had so many mean and rude comments directed at me at once.
It feels weird to say this, but no matter how confident I feel, the amount of mean comments I received at that moment all at once was shocking. Thankfully, only a few people were brave enough to direct message me, but because Dr. Martens shared my image on all social media platforms, I received mean, fat-phobic comments on all platforms. It was intimidating because I’ve been blogging for a while now and my following is still quite small, so I don’t often experience the same things that creators and influencers with bigger platforms go through.
So why am I sharing this? I want to show the reality of what influencers go through sometimes, but also vent about how I feel in the moment. I also hope that someone who needs it will receive this. Because all of this is a reminder to you and myself that we have to be grounded in ourselves and not let other people’s opinions sway us. It’s okay to be inspired. It’s okay to have a momentary feeling. It’s okay to question yourself. But…don’t stay there. Hold the momentary feeling and get back to knowing who you are.
The people who talk about you online don’t know you. They look at your images and make assumptions about your health, your habits, and who you are as a whole. They don’t know what you’ve been through or where you’re going. I realized the world is a crazy place last year when I saw fat-phobic comments left on photos of plus-size bodies (including me) shared by Athleta. People were really upset when they saw a plus-size woman in sportswear. Please help me understand what I mean.
In the end, you have to be happy with yourself because the world is a mess. People project their problems, insecurities, etc onto you for no reason. You are living your life happily. Keep doing it. Personally, I took this experience as a lesson to love myself wholeheartedly, take a break from social media when necessary, and that this may be preparation for something bigger in the future. If I had gone through this years ago, I don’t know if I would have been able to handle it as well as I am today. That in itself is a blessing.
How do you deal with hateful comments online? What do you do to stay calm on social media?
May God bless you.
Source: FabEllis – www.fabellis.com
