When Da Brat and Jesseca “Judy” Harris-Dupert answered my questions, it was immediately clear that they weren’t interested in honing their story for the masses. their new memoir, whereabouts of loveit doesn’t read like a well-curated highlight reel. It’s unfiltered, conversational, and grounded in lived experience, just like them.
And that’s exactly the point.
Why am I talking about this now?
The timing was no coincidence. That comes directly from those who have been watching their relationship.
“So many people have come up to us and said they want to see us on TV and want to know more,” they wrote. “So we decided to help others through our personal experiences: the good, the bad, and the ugly.”
Fans first saw their relationship unfold in Brat Loves Judy, and this book continues even further. It bridges the gap between what’s shown on air and what’s actually done, providing insights that reality TV couldn’t fully capture.
No filters or scripts required
One of the most striking things about this book is its resonance. Blatt’s Chicago rhythms and Judy’s New Orleans influences have not diminished. Those are the foundations.
“We were having real conversations, but we are not perfect, sophisticated women,” they wrote. “This is who we are and how we speak, so this is what you get.”
That choice makes this book feel tangible. It’s more like a conversation than a manual.
And for readers who think they already know the story, they hint at deeper layers.
“They would be surprised to learn that Brat wasn’t honest the first time…and Judy moved on.”
Coming out changed everything, and nothing.
Da Brat’s decision to live openly has been widely reported, but her reflections here feel more personal.
“I made no sacrifice in choosing to live my truth,” she wrote. “If I lose someone…they don’t deserve to be in my life anyway. It lifted a burden I hadn’t felt before.”
Meanwhile, Judy explained what it’s like to love someone who hasn’t been completely public yet.
“I was going to live in the closet with her until she was ready,” she wrote. “She overprotected my heart with love so I knew it was safe.”
Together they saw love as both timing and faith, requiring preparation but also trust when things align.
The true workings of human relationships
If there’s one thing they can’t avoid, it’s conflict.
They spoke candidly about how they were coping. “Judy has shut down…Brat wants to resolve it as soon as possible.”
And sometimes disagreements are small enough to be memorable.
“We laugh at the shitty weed whacker string,” they wrote. “Brat wanted to store it every week when the landscaper was there.”
This is a reminder that even the strongest relationships are built in everyday moments, not just milestones.
They also shared one rule they must forget. It’s all about maintaining communication with your ex-lover. It’s a boundary that evolved as the relationship between the two deepened.
love and business together
Their partnership extends beyond marriage to business and related ventures. kaleidoscope hair products.
Rather than duplicating roles, we clearly defined them.
“Judy will take care of the business and Brat will take care of the home,” they wrote. “We are focused on where our strengths lie.”
For Judy, turning their relationship into something tangible is part of a larger vision.
“For Brat, understanding her worth means everything,” she explained. “That’s my strength…making love and legacy profitable.”
Blatt added that working with his wife has brought a new perspective.
“Take risks, be unapologetically yourself and think before you open your mouth.”
visibility that means something
As one of the most visible Black queer couples in entertainment, their presence resonates beyond their own stories.
“We pride ourselves on encouraging, motivating, and uplifting anyone,” they wrote. “We both have big hearts…We must contribute to blessing others.”
When we asked them what healthy expression looks like, their answers were straightforward.
“Love. It seems like you and your man can overcome anything.”
And I hope this book provides clarity for readers who may still be afraid to live openly.
“Be yourself. Love unapologetically. You can never make everyone happy… You can only make others happy when you are happy.”
More than a love story
At its core, whereabouts of love It’s not just how they found each other. It’s about what it takes to stay, grow, and be honest in the process.
Not perfect or perfectly polished, just real.
And that’s exactly why it works.
Source: Gayety – gayety.com
