Two Grooms Marry at Oregon’s Columbia River Gorge

Ben (he/they) and Nolan (he/him) married at Mayer State Park in Mosier, Oregon, on a meadow above the Columbia River Gorge, with no officiant from a church, no DJ playing a predetermined list and no phones in anyone’s hands. Their best mutual friend married them. Their wedding party stood at the front while the two grooms walked down the aisle together. And every song played that day was by a queer artist, a decision as considered as any centerpiece or seating chart.

Oregon, From the Beginning

Oregon has always been the place for these two. They met there on vacation five years before they ever called it home, and it was on the Oregon coast that they got engaged, on a day when the Pacific coast decided to cooperate. “One of those rare, sunny, clear days in April,” Ben says. “So lucky.” From that first meeting in the state to a proposal on its shoreline and, finally, a ceremony in one of its most distinctive natural landscapes, the Columbia River Gorge functions less as a venue choice and more as a through line.

A Meadow in the Gorge

Mayer State Park sits along the Columbia River, and the meadow there, open and unhurried, shaped everything that followed. Blair and Caitlin of Trellis Flowers designed arrangements that matched it, whimsical in a way that felt native to the landscape rather than imported from a Pinterest board, while also honoring the color scheme the two grooms had settled on. Ben’s side wore emerald green. Nolan’s wore blue. Because the colors were a surprise to each other, both parties got ready separately before the first look, which gave that moment its own particular weight.

For the two grooms’ wedding looks, Nolan wore a blue Ted Baker suit and a creamy white boutoniere, while Ben wore an emerald green double-breasted cropped Aritzia suit paired with a black mock turtleneck. Nolan accessorized his suit with a pin that once belonged to his great-grandmother, and Ben carried a lush romantic groom’s bouquet of white garden roses, astilbe, dusty miller and eucalyptus.

The Ceremony They Actually Wanted

The ceremony began in the morning, with brunch to follow. Being morning people, Ben and Nolan made that call without apology. “We’re both morning people, so we made everyone else get up early, too,” Ben says, “even if some of our family needed an extra coffee or two.” A zero phone and electronics policy held through the entire event, which meant that when the two grooms walked down the aisle while their best women waited at the altar, every eye in attendance was actually on them.

Their first dance was to an acoustic version of “Imagine” performed by Ben Platt, one artist in a lineup chosen specifically because all of the music played that day came from queer musicians. That constraint, far from limiting, gave the soundtrack a coherence and a point of view.

Planning With Intention

In the two days before and after the wedding, the entire wedding party stayed together in a large Airbnb, eating well and spending time with the people they most wanted around them. There was no bachelor party in the traditional sense, just proximity and good food and the kind of unhurried time that a formal wedding weekend rarely allows.

The grooms kept their wedding list short. “We didn’t want to spend tens of thousands of dollars on a ceremony or deal with the associated stress of planning,” Ben says of their intimate wedding, “so we had to make our guest list extremely small, even if that did involve some tough phone calls.” A low-impact outdoor site in a state they love, a celebration sized to the people they actually wanted to be present, and a ceremony built entirely around their own vision rather than inherited expectations: the shape of the day was itself a statement.

Working with vendors, Ben and Nolan took a collaborative approach. “We pitched our general ideas and let them handle the rest,” Ben says. “We’re not flower designers or cake makers, but we had a general idea of the level of simplicity we wanted.” Banquette handled the cake. Trellis Flowers created the lush romantic floral designs. KMT Photos documented it all.

For Couples Planning Their Own Day

When asked what they’d tell other couples, Ben’s answer circled back to the same premise the whole wedding was built on. “Forget about tradition or doing it ‘right,’” they say. “Just do what makes you happy and what reminds you of why you’re in love.” That meant an early ceremony even when it inconvenienced guests, a guest list kept deliberately intimate, an outdoor site that required travel and a ceremony designed around the couple rather than convention. “We love the outdoors and the PNW, so we chose a site that made sense for us,” Ben says, “even if it involved some travel by ourselves and guests.”

As for finding vendors who would meet them where they were, Ben notes that their approach made that easier. “We had so few vendors that we knew the ones we were selecting were LGBTQ+ friendly,” they say. “We’re fortunate enough to live in an area where people are mostly accepting and lucky to not have to worry too much.”

“Really the main thing we focused on was making the day all about us and not worrying about what everyone else thought or making it traditional or religious,” Ben says. Walking each other down the aisle, choosing their friend as officiant, keeping phones out of the meadow entirely: each decision came from the same place. “Just do what makes you happy and what reminds you of why you’re in love.” ❤️

FEATURED LGBTQ+ INCLUSIVE AND QUEER AFFIRMING WEDDING VENDORS

Photographer: KMT Photos

Ceremony and Reception Venue: Mayer State Park, Columbia River Gorge

Florist: Trellis Flowers

Attire for Ben: Aritzia

Attire for Nolan: Ted Baker

Cake Designer: Banquette