It is said that wisdom comes with age. When I was younger, I laughed at that idea. I was convinced that I already had all the wisdom I needed. Now, so much time has passed, I laugh for completely different reasons, and because I really understood very little at the time.
one of Gifts that come with age It’s a point of view. You begin to realize that although the challenges you are facing may feel overwhelming right now, you have probably overcome some more difficult challenges before. It’s often, but not always, important.
I was reminded of this recently while talking to a young gay friend. A friend said that 2025 will be a devastating year for our community. He was also swearing. And he wasn’t wrong.
that It was An abominable year.
Related: Far-right, anti-LGBTQ+ Project 2025 will continue until 2026
In 2025, LGBTQ+ people were watching their hard-won progress unravel in real time. Diversity, equity, and inclusion programs have been dismantled at an alarming rate, often under the false banner of “equity.” Queer people, especially trans Americans, were targeted by the military and others, once again treated as debtors rather than patriots.
LGBTQ+ history We were removed from government websites and quietly erased from history, as if our contributions were an inconvenience rather than a fact.
Transgender people and transgender youth have borne the brunt of it. The ban on medical practices has been expanded. School policy treated their presence as controversial. Lawmakers talked about them not as children, neighbors, families, or human beings, but as challenges, problems to be solved, fears of exploitation, and dangers of unfamiliarity.
Pride itself was under extreme pressure. Funding for Pride Marches and LGBTQ+ initiatives also disappeared. rainbow crosswalkthe very symbols of visibility and belonging, were painted over and wiped from the streets, as if our presence was a temporary mistake. meanwhile, Hate crimes continued to risefueled by rhetoric that painted queer people as a threat simply by existing.
For many of us, it felt like we had come so far and were held back.
I finally reached a point late in my life where I was completely comfortable being an openly and proud gay man. And I still am. I will continue to be grateful for the person I am. But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling even more anxious now. This is especially common when meeting new people, people you don’t know yet. A quiet calculation takes place. Guard going up. A question I hadn’t asked myself in years: “Are they safe?” I hadn’t asked myself that in a long time.
That question didn’t come out of nowhere. It comes after watching a more vocal crowd grow bolder, convinced that since Donald Trump and his allies are openly attacking us, they somehow have permission to do the same.
Author defender I was exposed to that reality in a way I didn’t expect. My column has been picked up by aggregators and spread far beyond our community, and that exposure has led to some truly hateful language being thrown around. Blame, slander, and poison disguised as someone’s unhelpful opinion. It’s disturbing and humiliating. Nevertheless, in this day and age, queer people are still seen as different and therefore disposable, leading some to treat it as acceptable and justified.
I felt this not only online, but also in my personal life. But did you know? They can be effective on their own. I can’t stay silent. None of us should. In fact, harsh words only encourage you to dig deeper.
That’s where wisdom comes into play. I know we have been through much worse. Maybe you are too.
And some of us have it worse.
It’s been said many times, but it bears repeating. everytime. meanwhile, aids crisisit was still so bad that it’s hard to express it properly in words. It felt insurmountable. Life itself seems fleeting, hope dims into a dangerous shadow, and one’s sense of self can disintegrate into near worthlessness.
fear I feel that it was a very modest word for the time. Simply calling it “scary” seemed too simplistic.
Related: 1987 looms as a year of fear, fortitude, and firsts for the AIDS quilt, Nancy Pelosi, and me.
There were no celebrities on the covers of magazines, no likeable LGBTQ+ characters on TV or movies, no openly gay colleagues chatting freely in the office. Or a Pride flag flying above a desk, on a store door, or outside a dimly lit gay bar.
It was a terribly lonely year in which I felt completely alone in a world that accused me of being out of line. Even worse, imagine you have a disease that is deadly just by existing. And you were trying to infect them. Some people didn’t hug you. More people won’t kiss you. Being loved felt like a luxury.
What saved us then was not comfort or acceptance. It was mutual.
we are united. we fought. We wanted to be noticed, treated, and valued. Our resolve is firm and resilient, and that is exactly what is happening again.
The pendulum of hatred and exclusion has swung far, almost violently, to the right. But 2026 is an opportunity to delay that.
related: What will 2026 be like for queer people? Here’s what’s written in the stars
There is a battle ahead. we have doubts. And in the next midterm elections, we will once again be weaponized as a cultural wedge issue. Our lives, our families, and our health care will be debated by people who know little about us and are even more indifferent to us.
But every political leader I’ve talked to in the past year, including U.S. senators, elizabeth warren and U.S. Rep. Chris Murphy. Ro KhannaJamie Raskin Maxwell Frostetc., expressed a similar belief: The American people will ultimately not tolerate hatred and brutality. I want to believe that they are right. More than that, we need to believe that they are right.
Related: Gen Z candidate Maxwell Frost: “Partner” to the LGBTQ+ community
Voters must recognize and turn away from the cruelty when queer people are used as political fodder.
At the same time, 2026 gives us something. Now more than ever, we have the opportunity to be loud, proud, and visible. Visibility is always our biggest advantage. our best attribute. And I have no doubt that we will continue to do what we have been doing, thereby stopping the pendulum from swinging any further.
Our only recourse is resilience. Support each other. Refuse to shrink. Fierce, unapologetically proud.
We have more allies, more recognition, and more love than at any point in history. That’s important. We need to remember that, especially when fear tries to convince us otherwise.
we are not alone. Not even close.
It’s not easy. There’s no point in sugar-coating it. The far right and Christian extremists will do it. what they have always done, And that’s what hits us hard. But I would argue that we are more prepared than ever. We have gained so much wisdom over the years, especially in the last year.
And wisdom is very powerful when combined with community.
Someday, people much younger than me will look back on this moment with their own wisdom. They will tell the generations after them that there were certainly times when things were not good. When fear grows and hate feels dominant.
But we survived. We do that all the time.
Source: Advocate.com – www.advocate.com
