I confess.
I am a licensed professional counselor, but I cannot speak to anyone up until two days before the appointment. Inside Out 2I’m still the first Inside Out.
I know, it’s cheating.
Despite the hype, Inside Out It lived up to my expectations and exceeded them. The personification of the core emotions like sadness, joy, fear, anger, and disgust was pleasant and impactful (though it’s debatable whether disgust is really a core emotion). Even if you don’t understand emotions at all, you can’t help but see your own emotions in the emote characters and see that they are trying to help us.
Additionally, the portrayal of depression as something separate from both sadness and joy was moving and psychologically accurate. The most direct way out of depression is to connect with it and give yourself the emotionally safe time and space to grieve. And yes, Bing Bong’s “Take her to the moon” scene made me cry.
I had high expectations, to say the least. Inside Out 2The introduction of more emotion was elegant, the exploration of one’s innermost self amid the turmoil of adolescence well executed, but something just didn’t seem right, something was missing for me.
It took me a few days to find the words, but once I found time to review the film with some therapist friends, the words finally began to come.
“I don’t know,” I said. “The dilemmas the human characters faced just seemed too light-hearted. I mean, they seemed too innocent and too light-hearted to be real for eighth graders.”
“I mean, what did you expect?” a friend asked.
“Well, when I think about the inner world of an eighth grader, I think it’s a lot darker. For example, a child may be struggling with deep shame, or with a stark dichotomy between who they are and who they present to others. Or they may feel isolated and lonely, even when they appear to have friends.”
And then it dawned on me: I was talking about my own emotional experiences as an adolescent, and my experiences were not normal.
I spent my adolescence in the closet.
I was describing my own emotional experiences as an adolescent, but my experiences were not normal.
I’ve been out for over a decade, and I make a living by sharing my experiences with faith and sexuality. And yet, it’s easy to forget how tough my teenage years were. It’s easy to forget how unusual adolescence was. It’s easy to take for granted that the years of suffering I endured while staying out were unnecessary evil. God longed for me to escape the tragedy of coming out, but the church’s unfaithfulness made that impossible.
God did not intend for me to become sexually aroused by some of my friends, then immediately fall into self-loathing, banging my head against the proverbial (and sometimes literally) wall for harboring repulsive desires, and then pursue purity with an obsessive religiosity, fearing that Christ’s work on the cross would not cover up my abominations.
God didn’t want me to worry that my friends would bully me or kick me out of my house if they found out my secret. He didn’t want me to hide from all my friends and family, to analyze every word I said and every gesture I made to avoid giving away my secret, or to set myself up for a lifetime of lies and isolation.
God never intended for the innocence of my childhood to be lost so quickly and so tragically.
that’s why, Inside Out 2 Although it didn’t sit well with me, I found it to be an emotionally nurturing experience nonetheless. Watching the film and processing it with friends brought me back to the original core lesson. Inside Out: When the world is not the way it should be and the pain continues, connect with the blue lump of sadness inside and cry your heart out.
The wounds of the closet run deep, and overcoming trauma is rarely a one-time process. Those of us who have hidden our sexual attractions for years or even decades can be forgiving of ourselves when a children’s movie reminds us that we weren’t meant to be, evoking the specter of adolescence. We can make space to grieve.
But what if we harnessed it? What if Christian survivors from the closet gave meaning to our pain by helping to ensure that our children never had to be in the closet again? Sadly, even in the 2020s, studies show that the average LGBT+ person waits five years after realizing they are same-sex or gender non-conforming before coming out to their parents or pastor.
Teens are still afraid that if they share their stories, they’ll be called abominable, or called dirty and disgusting, or bullied or kicked out of their homes or churches. They spend five years trying to understand big questions about identity and self-worth without the love or wisdom of their parents. Instead, they’re left alone in the dark, surrounded by the enemy’s lies and the brokenness of the world. For many, this leads to loneliness, shame, anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, and questions about whether God loves us or even exists.
What if instead gay Christians who believe in God’s wisdom taught every parent in their church how to communicate these simple but life-saving words to their children:
If you realize you are gay or transgender, will you tell me right away? It’s not your fault. You don’t have to figure it out alone. God isn’t surprised. He loves you deeply and has a good, beautiful plan for your life. I love you deeply. We can figure this out together.
That way, the children at church Inside Out 2 And we see ourselves in the painful but not traumatic adolescence depicted in the film.
Source: Christ and Pop Culture – christandpopculture.com
